Home sweet home [Maya]

[chance]

It had been a long four weeks. His dad had a serious emergency at work and his Nan had been in the hospital. He'd worked a deal with the school to keep up his studies, and headed overseas where his family had gone together for his dad's work. It was just going to be a brief week long stay, then his Nan ended up getting extremely ill and they weren't sure she was going to make it. Fortunately, she did and his dad got his acquisition. Chance got to meet some lovely young ladies and all was right with the world.

The car pulled up to the Academy at about a quarter past nine and Chance pulled himself out of the car, exhausted. He took his bags from the driver and flashed him a quick smile before he made his way inside. Tiredly he'd made his way to his room and opened the door. The bags got dropped on the floor and his tie and over shirt got thrown onto a chair.

Chance yawned as he made his way down to the kitchen for a snack, and then headed toward his room again. He wasn't paying attention to what the other people in the halls were whispering. He was completely unaware that his ex was back in town and at the academy. He pushed his way into his room and set the food down on the nightstand before falling backwards onto his bed and kicking off his shoes.

[Echo]

Maya was in her black tank top and loose pajama pants she picked up in Chinatown, she was ready to do some light reading then head to bed. She was lucky enough to have her old room back. Late nights hadn't been her thing since she got back to Boston two weeks ago. Her late night patrols in NYC and bar hopping with some college friends were long behind her now that she was back. Maya wanted to get her life in order before she started anything new, like traveling the world. The first step to her plan was to make some money doing what she thought would be profitable and good for her. There was no way she was putting her good looks and dancing skills to work at Red Heels, the highest quality Gentlemen's Club. She didn't liked to be told what to do and how much to enjoy it.

Her page of Beloved was opened to the middle of the second chapter when she got a text from Julian. Why Maya ever gave her number out to him was a mystery. She must have had a brain fart or drank too much that night. She curiously opened her phone and read Yo, your man's back. lol. That was it. Maya looked at it harder and tried to figure out what that meant. The woman wasn't slow, she knew that Chance was back from where ever it was he was at. She sprung up from her bed and walked hastily towards his bed room. Her heart raced as he figured out what she would say to him when she saw him. Maya knew well enough that he would be pissed beyond relief, but it was better to just get this over with right now. Hell she'd waited long enough to tell him that she was leaving, but she didn't want to make that mistake twice.

The tall woman stopped right in front of his closed door and waited for anything that would summon her courage to knock on the door. Maya bit the corner of her lip and placed her hand on the door before giving it a sharp knock. "Chance, its me Maya." she said, trying to keep a straight voice.

[chance]

Both hands were over his face as he let out a slow breath. He sat up and pulled the plate into his lap and was about to start eating when there was a knock on his door, then a familiar voice. His heart clenched and suddenly his appetite fled. He set the plate down and just sat there for a full minute. He knew she wouldn't hear him and he could just ignore her. Pretend she didn't exist, kind of like she did to him.

With a growl he stood up and ripped the door open. A brow went up and he just looked at her, not saying a word. His eyes were colder than they were before, and that smile that was so easy wasn't in evidence either. He just stood there looking at her, torn between wanting to kiss her stupid or slamming the door in her face. Telling her to 'fuck off' before doing so of course. But he did neither, he just stood there staring down at her.

[Echo]

Her mind raced to figure out what she wanted to say. There was so much, but like with every good hook it had to be quick and catchy. If she simply said 'hey' and spoke to him like nothing happened, she would be lying to herself. Maya hadn't been herself when she was alone in NY and felt that going back to the Academy would bring part of her old life back. She was partially right. Her usual stoic appearance melted now she was about to face Chance.

Maya waited for a minute, thinking he wasn't going to come out. Maybe he wasn't in there. That would make her feeling of anxiety and fear subdued, but only until the morning. Then it would be ten times worse. Just as she was about to leave and muddle over a better conversation starter, his door opened and he stood there in the door way, glaring at her. Maya unclenched her teeth and crossed her arms over chest. She waited a second for him to react to her presence, but there was nothing other than his icy glare. Maya adverted her gaze from his for a moment before daring to take a glance back at the cold stare still focussed on her. She didn't like this attention, but she knew that was what she deserved.

"I'm sorry." she said, getting ready to walk back to her room and shoot holes in her wall.

[chance]

His heart was beating rapidly, somewhere in the vicinity of his throat, as he just looked down at the woman. There was a time that he would have done anything for her. She was the first woman he'd actually loved, someone he thought had feelings for him back. Then she just left him without a word and he never heard from her again. He had thought she was different from the other girls. He was right, she was different, she was so much worse. At least that was his thinking at the moment.

I'm sorry. After all this time, that was all she had to say. Well what the hell was she sorry for? Leaving? Making him think they had a chance? Breaking his heart? Fucking with his emotions? Did he really want to know the answer to those questions? He wasn't sure. "That's good to know. What are you sorry about? What do you want?" His voice was controlled and that was noticeable by the tightening of his jaw and his grip on the door. With a low growl, he knew she would hear, he stepped aside and opened the door wider.

[Echo]

Maya watched carefully at the expressions that flickered across his face. She tried to find some small hint of the kindness she knew that he possessed, but her well trained eyes knew that she didn't deserve any of it. Part of Maya wished she never went to talk to him, but the other part was singing just at the sight of him. This was exactly why she left without seeing him. Maya knew that if she saw him, she would change her mind about leaving him for her mother. Her mom wasn't the perfect role model of parenting. Gloria Lopez was in fact the worse mother in the world and Maya didn't owe her anything. The only thing the woman did for her was sending Maya to her dance academy. Her mother didn't even know that Maya was a mutant.

It was strange that this came into her mind at this particular moment. She wanted to pass the blame onto her mother's insanity, but she knew that wasn't true. It wasn't her mother that prevented her from contacting Chance. It was her pride that made her embarrassed about her circumstances. Maya could have easily made up a story about wanting to go back to Juilliard, but she knew she couldn't lie to him.

"I'm sorry that I didn't tell you I was leaving. I'm sorry that I just walked out of your life." she said, copying the same controlled voice that Chance had. She didn't trust her emotions right now. " And I wanted to... I wanted to tell you that," Maya almost said that she missed him. She knew that she couldn't trust herself to speak. She pressed her lips together and waited for him. Maya's eyes widened as she watched him open the door enough for her to enter. With her arms still crossed she entered, making sure to stay as small as possible in his room.

[chance]

That was all she wanted to tell him? His heart twisted and his jaw set. He could tell this wasn't easy for her, what he didn't know was what wasn't easy for her. The having to face him because she didn't give a shit anymore, or the fact that she did give a shit and couldn't face him. When she entered the room he shut the door and moved to lean against his dresser. Chance was at a loss, he knew right now if he wasn't careful he'd say things he'd regret. The two things he'd say were either he loved her or he hated her. He honestly couldn't tell which would come out of his mouth.

"That's it? That's all you came to say?" He was looking for something, anything to tell him that he hadn't wasted his heart on her. "Well, you've said it. Not sure what it accomplished, but you said it. Is there anything else you want to say? Like oh... I don't know... why you left? Where you've been? Why you couldn't send me a postcard that said 'Fuck you, Chance'. Anything?" He was hurt way more than he'd ever admit that he was. The last couple of years have been nothing but drinking, whoring, and working. Anything to try to forget her, it usually worked, for about five minutes. He doubted she'd thought of him at all. She'd have called him if she had, wouldn't she?

[Echo]

It was like she got punched in the chest, having this exact conversation in real life was harder than in her dreams - well sometimes they were nightmares. Maya hoped that Chance didn't think she had forgotten about him, but she never gave him the slightest hint that confirmed that either way. In her head, she'd seen almost every possible way her coming back would work out. From them making up instantaneously like in the movies with a passionate kiss to finding him with another woman and even finding him dead plagued her nights. But she'd never admit that.

The last four years without any contact with him had been Maya's dark ages. She couldn't say that she didn't get anything done, she'd gotten her degree and learned to live in the real world, but she couldn't ever say that she was happy with the way her life was there. New York was supposed to be this awesome place where people [were able to re invent themselves. For Maya it was where she realized that she was happiest at the Academy, with Chance.

She watched warily at Chance's words. He had put aside his cool business manner and started to show his frustration and anger. There were many things she wanted to tell him. Maya nodded. "I left because my mother was ill. I was in New York City, Brooklyn to be exact. She needed a lot of help, before she passed. I didn't leave because of you. And I have no good explanation for why I didn't write you. I never went a day without thinking about you." she said clearly. "But if you want one, I was scared. I've never felt that way about anyone before and when my mother needed me, I was embarrassed by her. I knew that you would have wanted to help and I didn't want that. At the time it all made sense for me to just pack my things and leave."

[chance]

Chance kept his distance from her, and his hands in his pockets and just watched her. He didn't know if he got to close if he would strangle her or hold her. He really didn't want to do either one, not yet. The idea of both hurt him very much and he was trying to wrap his head around the fact that she was back. Let alone the fact that she was in his room. One hand reached up and rubbed the back of his neck as his blue gaze stayed on her.

As she began to talk, his jaw hardened as well as his eyes. Steel blue eyes narrowed a bit. "Let me get this straight. You needed me and you didn't let me be there? Because you were embarrassed and afraid I'd want to help? What the fuck! I was your boyfriend for godssake, I was supposed to be there for you damn it. I was supposed to be there emotionally and for whatever reason you needed me for. So because you were to god damned stubborn to come to me when I could have helped you, you thought it would be best just to pack up and leave? Not even having the decency to break up with me first? Or wait... Were you even really my girlfriend or was that all in my head? Because that would make so much more sense. Then I could understand if this whole thing had just been a one sided daydream." He didn't know if he was more hurt than angry or the other way around. The fact that she didn't want his help was like a slap in the face. The fact she thought it was better that she just leave without a word, was a punch to the gut.

[Echo]

Maya kept her mouth shut while he spoke. It was true, she was stubborn, but she always thought that they were in an exclusive relationship. Chance had been her first real boyfriend and Maya didn't know how to act differently and was selfish in thinking she was doing the right thing by him. So far she'd kept a distant point of view when she spoke to him, but when he said "Or wait... Were you even really my girlfriend or was that all in my head?" she was some how snapped back into the conversation.

"Don't you dare say that. I said I was your girlfriend and I called you my boyfriend. You think I would have just done it with anyone?" she said harshly, "Would you have rather I tell you that I was leaving and I didn't want your help? Would have have been the kinder way? I was confused and didn't know how to handle the situation with her. She still believed my father was a live, that was over fifteen years ago! I didn't want you to see her that way, I didn't want you to see me so - so lost." she said. Maya let out frustrated groan. Why couldn't she just come here to say what she wanted to say? Maybe subconsciously thought that admitting she missed him and still cared for him was admitting defeat over some stupid mind game she played.

"I missed you Chance. I made a mistake. Alright, that is what I came here to say." she huffed.

[chance]

"I don't really know, Maya. I guess your idea of what a relationship is, is vastly different from mine. See, now I always told you when I had to go and I always told you why. It never mattered the reason, I always told you." Oh he was pissed and hurt more than he could ever imagine right now. Each word that came out of her mouth just twisted the knife she left in his heart all those years ago. "Yes! I wanted you to tell me that you had to go. I wanted you to tell me that it was something you had to do on your own. I would have respected it. I wanted you to warn me that maybe, just maybe you wouldn't be able to get into contact with me. You think letting me think that you were dead somewhere or that you just didn't want me was kinder? How fucked up is that?" He was breathing hard as let out that barrage, not even sure if she was able to follow it all.

"You were supposed to come to me when it was something like this. That's what people in relationships do, they rely on each other, not shut each other out. You might have called me your boyfriend, but how serious did you actually take it? I would have moved heaven and earth for you, or let you do your thing, if you needed me to. You were supposed to come to me, damn it." Blue eyes narrowed at her, his hands were clenched in fists in his pocket. He wanted to hit something, not her, never her, but something. "You wanted me to know that you missed me? That's it? That's the only reason you came here? Well, that just makes everything all fucking fine and dandy, now doesn't it. God knows how many years thinking you were dead are all wiped away by the fact that you missed me."

[Echo]

Maya tried to keep up with what he was saying, but she was too tired and emotionally stressed to catch ever part he said. "Your idea of what a relationship , different from mine" and that he always told her where he was going was what he said first. That was all true, Chance even told her when he was heading out to get chinese. He'd even bring her back some. Maya didn't want to see anything more, but she knew that she had to.

As a trained and experienced fighter, Maya liked to have some advantage over her opponent and never give up that leverage. However she didn't think of Chance as her enemy, but the complete opposite. She hated this type of fighting, one where she can't use her weapons or even her fists. Her words never expressed the way she was feeling and she'd never lay a hand on Chance. She was at a stalemate. Maya would never hurt him, but it seemed that her actions were deadlier.

A wave of guilt washed over her as he continued to speak. The things he said were much harder for her than what she imagined. Why did she have some romantic notion that everything would be okay? "No I don't expect everything to be alright now. I just, I actually don't know why I came here. Someone told me you were back and I wanted to see you." she said finally. Maya's arms had fallen her her sides and she stood in the middle of his room. She didn't know what else to say. "I can't change the past. Now I know I should have told you and that I was wrong. Please, I'm just trying to... apologize. You don't have to accept it, hell you can still hate me for what I did to you." she said, her voice getting higher than normal.

[chance]

"And I spent quite some time just wanting to hear your voice, to know that you were alright. God, Maya do you have any idea how worried I was about you? I thought you were dead for godssake." He took a step towards her and then stopped. Chance didn't know what he wanted to do at the moment. He wanted to hurt her as much as she hurt him, he knew that much. But he wasn't sure how long that would last, just being around her weakened his resolve to tell her to screw off and never come back. Or that she should have stayed gone.

"I don't hate you. I don't like you very much right now, but I don't hate you. I can't just... Pretend it all didn't happen, every time I see you I'm going to remember you couldn't trust me. That you didn't feel you could come to me. I knew you were independent, I just didn't realize how much. I can't just... accept the apology, not right now. Not will all this shit going on in my head." Eventually he probably would, but right now he just wanted to hit something or hold her.

[Echo]

Maya let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding on to. She saw that he was trying not to elevate the conversation to more than talking. Honestly, Maya never thought about what would happen if he ever did hit her. She'd be shocked for sure, but usually when someone hit her, she'd hit right back. Maya already decided though that she wouldn't ever retaliate in this situation. She'd caused enough damage by not doing anything.

The woman prepared herself for the worst- just as she automatically did, but her eyes blinked as she stopped without approaching any closer. Maya stared into his icy blue eyes and wanted to melt in shame for what she did to him. "I understand. I'll leave now." she said while nodding and heading out the door. Maya walked back to her room, feeling the weight of five years lift off of her, but only to be replaced by a more sickening one in her heart.